Unfortunately it seems like i'm coming to a rather unhappy point in my life. Without going into specifics, i'm just gonna say i'm tired.
Not physically tired, although i'm fighting a screwy throat infection at the moment. I hate that feeling. Being unable to swallow without wincing is not the best of experiences.
Not mentally tired, despite the battering my mind is getting from classes like KI or economics. I sit there and know i HAVE to absorb or die. But sometimes, I just don't have the strength to.
Not emotionally tired, although many many things are happening which are potentially draining. Yes i have control, but i'm tired all the same.
I'm just tired. I feel like a grain of sand trying to push against the sea. It's like I have no effect on my surroundings whatsoever.
I know it's unreasonable, but sometimes I wish I was more stoic. More like a regular guy. Your average easy going, joke cracking, girl chasing, soccer playing, sterotypical kinda guy..
And the icing on the cake is that i know the real fun hasn't started. Yee ha.
But whenever i get into this line of thought, i ask myself if i'm being selfish. And the only possible answer is yes. If i can do something about something or help someone about something and i choose not to, i'm being selfish.
That drives me on. That's why i won't stop going. That's why i dare hazard running on a negative fuel tank.
Emphathy is both a blessing and a curse. I cannot help but feel. I JUST CANNOT STOP IT. IT'S A DARN LEECH
I won't live for myself alone. I can't. I'll get so disgusted with myself i'll probably do something crazy.
But perhaps, just perhaps. It would be nice to have another grain of sand with me too.
Not physically tired, although i'm fighting a screwy throat infection at the moment. I hate that feeling. Being unable to swallow without wincing is not the best of experiences.
Not mentally tired, despite the battering my mind is getting from classes like KI or economics. I sit there and know i HAVE to absorb or die. But sometimes, I just don't have the strength to.
Not emotionally tired, although many many things are happening which are potentially draining. Yes i have control, but i'm tired all the same.
I'm just tired. I feel like a grain of sand trying to push against the sea. It's like I have no effect on my surroundings whatsoever.
I know it's unreasonable, but sometimes I wish I was more stoic. More like a regular guy. Your average easy going, joke cracking, girl chasing, soccer playing, sterotypical kinda guy..
And the icing on the cake is that i know the real fun hasn't started. Yee ha.
But whenever i get into this line of thought, i ask myself if i'm being selfish. And the only possible answer is yes. If i can do something about something or help someone about something and i choose not to, i'm being selfish.
That drives me on. That's why i won't stop going. That's why i dare hazard running on a negative fuel tank.
Emphathy is both a blessing and a curse. I cannot help but feel. I JUST CANNOT STOP IT. IT'S A DARN LEECH
I won't live for myself alone. I can't. I'll get so disgusted with myself i'll probably do something crazy.
But perhaps, just perhaps. It would be nice to have another grain of sand with me too.
- Mood:
melancholy
So finally, the day's almost here.
All the work of four years comes down to this. And I'm hell nervous. I heard a phrase "worry is like sitting on a rocking chair. You're doing something, but going nowhere." How true. I'm running on a hamster wheel at the moment.
I know I know, you people tell me that I should have nothing to be afraid of cause my studies are good. Well, it's not that. Honestly, the "better" I seem to be, the more pressure on me.
Pressure to perform, pressure to meet the expectations of others.
The trouble is not about which JC I'll get into. Other than for my classmates and friends, I really don't mind any JC. The real trouble is when others find out that I screwed it.
You people are wonderful, but me being me, I still can sense shock, disappointment, or confusion if i say "I screwed O levels".
I love my face too much for my health.
In any case, I'll say now, so my future self will see this. I tried my best. There's nothing more I could have given.
If this is a screwup, that means I'm currently Just. Not. Good. Enough.
Heh this post actually is super pessismistic cause I'm preparing for the worst. No matter.
I've got a favour to ask from you. I'm not sure how many read this but I'll say it anyway.
If I do fall, please catch me fast, all you people from church. I know I have school friends, but only 3 or so of them will keep me standing.
The rest, I'm afraid have a tendency to be unable to sympathise, and might even kick people when they are down.
In any case, I'll try my best if someone else needs a friend to be there for them in the case that they fall bad.
Thanks all you people. Your presence is enough to keep me on.
till next time..
Lord, please. Hold me back till i can take it
All the work of four years comes down to this. And I'm hell nervous. I heard a phrase "worry is like sitting on a rocking chair. You're doing something, but going nowhere." How true. I'm running on a hamster wheel at the moment.
I know I know, you people tell me that I should have nothing to be afraid of cause my studies are good. Well, it's not that. Honestly, the "better" I seem to be, the more pressure on me.
Pressure to perform, pressure to meet the expectations of others.
The trouble is not about which JC I'll get into. Other than for my classmates and friends, I really don't mind any JC. The real trouble is when others find out that I screwed it.
You people are wonderful, but me being me, I still can sense shock, disappointment, or confusion if i say "I screwed O levels".
I love my face too much for my health.
In any case, I'll say now, so my future self will see this. I tried my best. There's nothing more I could have given.
If this is a screwup, that means I'm currently Just. Not. Good. Enough.
Heh this post actually is super pessismistic cause I'm preparing for the worst. No matter.
I've got a favour to ask from you. I'm not sure how many read this but I'll say it anyway.
If I do fall, please catch me fast, all you people from church. I know I have school friends, but only 3 or so of them will keep me standing.
The rest, I'm afraid have a tendency to be unable to sympathise, and might even kick people when they are down.
In any case, I'll try my best if someone else needs a friend to be there for them in the case that they fall bad.
Thanks all you people. Your presence is enough to keep me on.
till next time..
Lord, please. Hold me back till i can take it
I saw this off stacy's lj, and decided it might be a better idea than doing my christmas post which everyone else seems to be doing.
Ten different things you wished you could say to ten different people.
1) We've been out for each other over the years, and I'm still watching your back, as you do mine. You're the person who has the almost complete picture of who I truly am. And what i think is that over time, the strength of our relationship will simply deepen. Thank you. Again. I'll always be here for you.
2) Although you'll probably never understand this; I've seen you grow through the years, and I must say I'm proud of you for becoming who you are right now. The year ahead is going to be challenging for everyone, but especially you. In any case, I can't make your decisions, and neither will I directly influence them. But know this. No matter how much we might laugh at you or poke at you, we have your best interests at heart.
3) After so long, I still fear. I don't know how much I should, or can give to you without you withdrawing from me. In any case, I just want you to know that although you probably don't need me, I'll be there for you 24/7. Whenever, wherever. Always.
4) For the time I've known you, you've grown alot although it sounds wierd coming from someone like me. But anyway, I've grown to respect you for your protectiveness and your concern. Your impact is far greater than you might realise. Now, the next year might be all the more deadly for everyone, and you are one of the few who can make the actual difference cause I can't handle it alone. I know you will. I know you can.
5) You are one person who I shared my life with, and for some reason, I broke off, unsure. Now I've come to realise it wasn't your fault, nor mine. But in any case I would stil like to apologise for seeing you as someone who you weren't. Everyone's vison gets clouded at times, even mine. Although it's not too easy for me to regain trust of someone, I'll be doing my best.
6) Now you are the person to whom I'd really need to say this. The amount of stuff I know and hear about you is so vast, and so contrasting, that I really don't know what to believe. I'm not sure if I was previously decieved, or am currently decieved now. But one word of advice I have for you. I know who my people are. I know who will stand by me and who will die for or with me. I also know who I'll stand by, or die for. I too hope you already really know who your people are. If you're unsure, its high time you find out.
7) You are one person who I've worked with and our teaming up has increased our effectiveness. I truly enjoy working with you. You're a great friend, and I'm honoured to be yours. So please don't take what I'm going to say in anger. You need to be more emphatatic. Really. I'm not sure whether you think so, but i feel that you'll be a fuller person that way. Don't worry, in any case, it probably won't affect how i think of you in any way.
8) Although we don't really talk that much, I still respect you. Alot. At the point where you could have simply shunned me you took me as a friend. I still am not sure if i could have done the same, if positions were reversed.So I'd like to thank you for all you've been. You're more of a person than i could have been.
9) I've only recently got to talk to you, and know you, so I can't truly say much. In any case, i know you're a very very emotional person. I'd like to say although I can be a support, and will be for the matter, it's not entirely healthy for you. You need to hold your own and use that inner strength I KNOW that is in you. And btw, God has a plan for you. Don't settle for less.
10) You are chaos. It's not a compliment either. I believe its quite intentional, and I don't really like it this way. Really, being such is not the best way to cultivate friendships. I'm not saying i need to understand you to be your friend, but honestly, it'll help too.
till next time.happy new year.
- Mood:
calm
Ok im currently blogging from an internet access in a Korean hotel (on jeju island) and I must say i'm quite enjoying my holiday at the present moment.
But I rather wait till the end of the holiday till I blog about it in proper..
So, well well well. Its nigh impossible to get access from this godforsaken place.
Firstly, youth camp. I felt that this year was the most precise camp of all. Everything ran like clockwork. Bam, Bam, Bam next activity. Another thing for the camp was that, well, the worship was great. I know every camp has great worship, but i still felt this year was another piece which would be treasured in my memory.
As for the skits, well, I'm disappointed with myself. All I could come up with was that techno beat? Sad.. Ah well, there's always a next time. But I wonder whether I'm ever gonna be able to take bigger roles in acting. Not to say I actually want it, more of an observation.
Well, in any case, heres a little thing which i was thinking about during some of the longer bus rides (when I wasn't dead beat)..
Different kinds of angel-mortal.
The guy angel: He throws sweets at you all the time. But little else other than the occasional cup of milo, or packet of milo powder. You'll never get any long letters, only short ones. He sometimes goes on a hiatus as he ran out of gifts to give. This prompts recycled gifts, in which the gift from one angel mortal pair is passed on and on and on and on. This is especially obvious when it is a long chain of guy angels; you see a certain gift exchanging hands soo many times, and never consumed.
The girl angel: TYPICALLY more caring than a guy angel. This one writes notes most of the time asking whether you're well and healthy. You'll get gifts of a slightly better quality at times too. For example, snacks. Or if you're really lucky, you can get stuff like homemade food such as cookies or such.
The cross gender angel: This angel usually is a guy pretending to be a girl. This is because it is darn difficult to pretend to be a guy angel( they can pass off for simply lazy ones sometimes XD). This angel gets a female friend to write flowery notes and decorates them with colour paper and drawings *cringe*. He tends to shower his mortal with attention and gifts as well. If successful, they really get a kick. Especially if they notice their mortal, who if is a guy, speculating on which of the girls would have taken such an attraction to him.
The fun part is when the secrets of who is who's angel-mortal is revealed.
The prepared angel: This is usually a guy. He is meticulous bordering on freaky. He pre-prepares his notes in advance, using generic sentences like; "hope you are well, how was games?" In fact, in one case i heard about, this angel TYPED out his messages instead of hand writing them. In extreme cases, this angel might even have a mental timetable to follow. I'll illustrate
"ok, day 3 of the camp 1.30 afternoon. Lunch just started so i'll pass note 3a with strepsils and jj liang teh. Oh wait, it's before games so I'll add in a "be sporting into my note"
get the picture?
The stalker angel: Ok, I only have a few real examples of them.. *cough, jeshua, cough* but here goes. This angel is usually quite close to the mortal, therefore can respond almost immediately to their needs. It can get to the state when a mortal shouts "ANGEL! IM HUNGRY!" and in 2 min, food arrives with a note "happy now?"
Of course, i've never seen a full face picture being printed out just for the effect. Let's just leave it as Jeshua's signature move k?
I'm done for now.
Btw, i think smses to me are free, it just costs for me to send some back.
Till next time..
But I rather wait till the end of the holiday till I blog about it in proper..
So, well well well. Its nigh impossible to get access from this godforsaken place.
Firstly, youth camp. I felt that this year was the most precise camp of all. Everything ran like clockwork. Bam, Bam, Bam next activity. Another thing for the camp was that, well, the worship was great. I know every camp has great worship, but i still felt this year was another piece which would be treasured in my memory.
As for the skits, well, I'm disappointed with myself. All I could come up with was that techno beat? Sad.. Ah well, there's always a next time. But I wonder whether I'm ever gonna be able to take bigger roles in acting. Not to say I actually want it, more of an observation.
Well, in any case, heres a little thing which i was thinking about during some of the longer bus rides (when I wasn't dead beat)..
Different kinds of angel-mortal.
The guy angel: He throws sweets at you all the time. But little else other than the occasional cup of milo, or packet of milo powder. You'll never get any long letters, only short ones. He sometimes goes on a hiatus as he ran out of gifts to give. This prompts recycled gifts, in which the gift from one angel mortal pair is passed on and on and on and on. This is especially obvious when it is a long chain of guy angels; you see a certain gift exchanging hands soo many times, and never consumed.
The girl angel: TYPICALLY more caring than a guy angel. This one writes notes most of the time asking whether you're well and healthy. You'll get gifts of a slightly better quality at times too. For example, snacks. Or if you're really lucky, you can get stuff like homemade food such as cookies or such.
The cross gender angel: This angel usually is a guy pretending to be a girl. This is because it is darn difficult to pretend to be a guy angel( they can pass off for simply lazy ones sometimes XD). This angel gets a female friend to write flowery notes and decorates them with colour paper and drawings *cringe*. He tends to shower his mortal with attention and gifts as well. If successful, they really get a kick. Especially if they notice their mortal, who if is a guy, speculating on which of the girls would have taken such an attraction to him.
The fun part is when the secrets of who is who's angel-mortal is revealed.
The prepared angel: This is usually a guy. He is meticulous bordering on freaky. He pre-prepares his notes in advance, using generic sentences like; "hope you are well, how was games?" In fact, in one case i heard about, this angel TYPED out his messages instead of hand writing them. In extreme cases, this angel might even have a mental timetable to follow. I'll illustrate
"ok, day 3 of the camp 1.30 afternoon. Lunch just started so i'll pass note 3a with strepsils and jj liang teh. Oh wait, it's before games so I'll add in a "be sporting into my note"
get the picture?
The stalker angel: Ok, I only have a few real examples of them.. *cough, jeshua, cough* but here goes. This angel is usually quite close to the mortal, therefore can respond almost immediately to their needs. It can get to the state when a mortal shouts "ANGEL! IM HUNGRY!" and in 2 min, food arrives with a note "happy now?"
Of course, i've never seen a full face picture being printed out just for the effect. Let's just leave it as Jeshua's signature move k?
I'm done for now.
Btw, i think smses to me are free, it just costs for me to send some back.
Till next time..
Back from youth camp.
Well, as usual, it was great! Although my current tired state prevents me from feeling excited or hyper, i did enjoy it.
Will be off to Korea soon, so my blog is gonna grow quite a few cobwebs. Really bad i say for the hit counter. Oh wait, I don't have one. Okaay.
In any case, due to the camp, my attention span has SOMEHOW been reduced to a miserable 40 seconds. After that, i tend to drift off. That'll explain why my current post is so disjointed. (gosh, is that even a word??)
Yup, I also recieved a word from God. 2 actually, nope i wont share them.. it's just something i dont really do.
but in any case, this camp has given me quite a bit of food for thought. Really. I'm starting to really think. To really question. No I'm not saying i had blindfolds on my eyes before this (or even masking tape for the matter) But now I'm starting to look at... stuff... from some more different viewpoints.
And I'm disturbed.
But I'll need to wait for my exhaustion hangover to go off before I make any conclusions at all.
Till next time.
Well, as usual, it was great! Although my current tired state prevents me from feeling excited or hyper, i did enjoy it.
Will be off to Korea soon, so my blog is gonna grow quite a few cobwebs. Really bad i say for the hit counter. Oh wait, I don't have one. Okaay.
In any case, due to the camp, my attention span has SOMEHOW been reduced to a miserable 40 seconds. After that, i tend to drift off. That'll explain why my current post is so disjointed. (gosh, is that even a word??)
Yup, I also recieved a word from God. 2 actually, nope i wont share them.. it's just something i dont really do.
but in any case, this camp has given me quite a bit of food for thought. Really. I'm starting to really think. To really question. No I'm not saying i had blindfolds on my eyes before this (or even masking tape for the matter) But now I'm starting to look at... stuff... from some more different viewpoints.
And I'm disturbed.
But I'll need to wait for my exhaustion hangover to go off before I make any conclusions at all.
Till next time.
- Mood:
tired
Crash and Burn
Savage Garden
When you feel all alone
And the world has turned its back on you
Give me a moment please to tame your wild wild heart
I know you feel like the walls are closing in on you
Its hard to find relief and people can be so cold
When darkness is upon your door
and you feel like you cant take anymore
Let me be the one you call
If you jump Ill break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
Youre not alone
When you feel all alone
And a loyal friend is hard to find
Youre caught in a one way street
With the monsters in your head
When hopes and dreams are far away and
You feel like you cant face the day
Let me be the one you call
If you jump Ill break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
Youre not alone
And there has always been heartache and pain
And when its over you'll breathe again
You'll breath again
When you feel all alone
And the world has turned its back on you
Give me a moment please
To tame your wild wild heart
Let me be the one you call
If you jump Ill break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
Youre not alone
Great song isn't it?
I got addicted to it quite a while ago, still am.
don't think you're talking to me,
but if you are,
to the best of my ability. to the end of my strength.
Till next time.
- Mood: worried
Poem 30
Heartbreak
she came to me with magenta eyes,
features and gaze to hypnotise
right hand reaching out in an embrace,
left hand concealling a dagger in place
the icy stab was wonderously warm,
opened wound, the blood still shone
strangely for this, death never came,
while the knife in the flesh of mine remained
europhic pain, alluring tears
she whispered with delight in my ear,
of how this moment would never pass
of how forever we would stay and last
heat was rising, she held me near,
softly singing, her voice so clear
enraptured, captive, I believed every word,
truth and lies all so blurred
her delicate hands, knit and wove,
heartbeats hastened, the crimson liquid flowed.
she held to me a woven flask,
collecting drop by drop in it's knitted glass
sensual self, she moved once more,
playing of emotions like sirens of lore
I was so caught, held by her spell,
I never noticed her slicing so well
fingers interlaced, she smiled at me,
I returned the smile, it was meant to be
then a quick move, she pulled out her knife
and my being turned cold, devoid of life
in the last minute of agony's grip,
I looked to her eyes, her mouth, her lips
"who are you? You're not love."
"no, i'm heartbreak"
Um, no when i did this poem i wasn't really emo. I was forcing it out, so pardon me if i'm a little off towards the end.
Exams are nearly nearly over!
Till next time
Heartbreak
she came to me with magenta eyes,
features and gaze to hypnotise
right hand reaching out in an embrace,
left hand concealling a dagger in place
the icy stab was wonderously warm,
opened wound, the blood still shone
strangely for this, death never came,
while the knife in the flesh of mine remained
europhic pain, alluring tears
she whispered with delight in my ear,
of how this moment would never pass
of how forever we would stay and last
heat was rising, she held me near,
softly singing, her voice so clear
enraptured, captive, I believed every word,
truth and lies all so blurred
her delicate hands, knit and wove,
heartbeats hastened, the crimson liquid flowed.
she held to me a woven flask,
collecting drop by drop in it's knitted glass
sensual self, she moved once more,
playing of emotions like sirens of lore
I was so caught, held by her spell,
I never noticed her slicing so well
fingers interlaced, she smiled at me,
I returned the smile, it was meant to be
then a quick move, she pulled out her knife
and my being turned cold, devoid of life
in the last minute of agony's grip,
I looked to her eyes, her mouth, her lips
"who are you? You're not love."
"no, i'm heartbreak"
Um, no when i did this poem i wasn't really emo. I was forcing it out, so pardon me if i'm a little off towards the end.
Exams are nearly nearly over!
Till next time
- Mood:
listless
another attempt at a humourous post. Not very humourous, but at least I'm trying..
well, here we go with cartoon characters.
Many a time, I feel that cartoon characters live in a world of their own...
*slaps self*
OF COURSE THEY LIVE IN A WORLD OF THEIR OWN!!!
ah well, let me try again. Cartoon characters, how do I start? It's such a large range, from anime, to those comic strips.
Amazing isn't it? But almost everyone of them has some oddity which makes them even more endearing to their audiences.
One example, typical looney tunes characters. Toons like bugs bunny are an obvious impossibility. Why? Other than the fact that animals DON'T TALK, bunnies NEVER sit around chewing carrots, passing smartass remarks (yeah yeah i know, they can't talk in the first place) because most of the time their running and hiding from danger.
Oh well, I don't really like the looney tunes, so I'm moving on. Ah yes, other characters aren't as innocent as they seem to be. Remember Tom and Jerry? That is by far the most sadistic, twisted cartoon ever created in the history of cartoons. It goes something like this.
Cat chases mouse, mouse pushes a bowling ball off the edge of a legde. Hits cat on the head. Cat gets knocked silly. Viewers laugh.
Amazing isn't it? They way kids can derive such pleasure from the pain of dear Tom? And what the heck happened to those SPCA cruelty to animals campaigns?? This show obviously proves it's utter failure!
Cartoons are also a rather fustrated bunch of people. Take popeye for instance (sailor man, in case you people forgot). He is one heck of a sexually deprived individual, not to mention mentally stunted as well. His girlfriend(olive) of.. a few decades at my last count remains at that. His girlfriend. Futhermore, they don't even frigging KISS each other! I mean, after SOO long, and their relationship hasn't even passed first base.. (of course, I do not know what goes on off screen, but as this is all imaginary in the first place, I'll leave it as that; imagination)
And god knows what popeye puts in his spinach. It's spiked. With what I do not know, but it's hellishly effective. For all we know he might be the originator of those illegal steroids which certain dubious atheletes seem to enjoy using! And by looking at it's potency, it might just rival the ones German atheles were using back in the 1930s.
For the record, the chemicals they swallowed then were so powerful, it effectively turned girls into guys.
Other than this, there are a number of oddities amongst the toon population. For example, powerpuff girls. I watched one episode when I was 10 and never again. But the show was bloody burned in my retinas. Not because of the show itself, but because of the lack of logic.
It was all okay till the show started professing that those 3 lil' powerhouses were made up of "sugar, spice and everything nice" plus a generous dosage of chemical X, whatever that thing might be. So, what does this make these.. things out to be? Organic pinyatas? I mean, that's what they're made of? Right?
Ah well, dear dear me. Fragile, handle with care is an understatement in this case.
Anyway, certain characteristics of cartoon characters also are rather endearing at times. For example, they are ardent believers in "what you don't know can't hurt you"
Really. If one walks off a cliff without realising it, he won't fall till, well, he realises it.
I'm throwing my physics textbook out of the window as I type.
Other than this, Cartoon characters also seem to be first cousins to the western hero(refer to earlier post in september). Both get power boosts out of thin air, and both are quite indestructible. I'll use tom and jerry as example again. After being squashed, hit, frozen, bitten, bashed up, thrown into a lake, run over by miscellaneous vehicles, burnt, sent to hell(yes, tom went there in one episode) they are STILL alive and well.
*shakes head*
Amazing things.
well, here we go with cartoon characters.
Many a time, I feel that cartoon characters live in a world of their own...
*slaps self*
OF COURSE THEY LIVE IN A WORLD OF THEIR OWN!!!
ah well, let me try again. Cartoon characters, how do I start? It's such a large range, from anime, to those comic strips.
Amazing isn't it? But almost everyone of them has some oddity which makes them even more endearing to their audiences.
One example, typical looney tunes characters. Toons like bugs bunny are an obvious impossibility. Why? Other than the fact that animals DON'T TALK, bunnies NEVER sit around chewing carrots, passing smartass remarks (yeah yeah i know, they can't talk in the first place) because most of the time their running and hiding from danger.
Oh well, I don't really like the looney tunes, so I'm moving on. Ah yes, other characters aren't as innocent as they seem to be. Remember Tom and Jerry? That is by far the most sadistic, twisted cartoon ever created in the history of cartoons. It goes something like this.
Cat chases mouse, mouse pushes a bowling ball off the edge of a legde. Hits cat on the head. Cat gets knocked silly. Viewers laugh.
Amazing isn't it? They way kids can derive such pleasure from the pain of dear Tom? And what the heck happened to those SPCA cruelty to animals campaigns?? This show obviously proves it's utter failure!
Cartoons are also a rather fustrated bunch of people. Take popeye for instance (sailor man, in case you people forgot). He is one heck of a sexually deprived individual, not to mention mentally stunted as well. His girlfriend(olive) of.. a few decades at my last count remains at that. His girlfriend. Futhermore, they don't even frigging KISS each other! I mean, after SOO long, and their relationship hasn't even passed first base.. (of course, I do not know what goes on off screen, but as this is all imaginary in the first place, I'll leave it as that; imagination)
And god knows what popeye puts in his spinach. It's spiked. With what I do not know, but it's hellishly effective. For all we know he might be the originator of those illegal steroids which certain dubious atheletes seem to enjoy using! And by looking at it's potency, it might just rival the ones German atheles were using back in the 1930s.
For the record, the chemicals they swallowed then were so powerful, it effectively turned girls into guys.
Other than this, there are a number of oddities amongst the toon population. For example, powerpuff girls. I watched one episode when I was 10 and never again. But the show was bloody burned in my retinas. Not because of the show itself, but because of the lack of logic.
It was all okay till the show started professing that those 3 lil' powerhouses were made up of "sugar, spice and everything nice" plus a generous dosage of chemical X, whatever that thing might be. So, what does this make these.. things out to be? Organic pinyatas? I mean, that's what they're made of? Right?
Ah well, dear dear me. Fragile, handle with care is an understatement in this case.
Anyway, certain characteristics of cartoon characters also are rather endearing at times. For example, they are ardent believers in "what you don't know can't hurt you"
Really. If one walks off a cliff without realising it, he won't fall till, well, he realises it.
I'm throwing my physics textbook out of the window as I type.
Other than this, Cartoon characters also seem to be first cousins to the western hero(refer to earlier post in september). Both get power boosts out of thin air, and both are quite indestructible. I'll use tom and jerry as example again. After being squashed, hit, frozen, bitten, bashed up, thrown into a lake, run over by miscellaneous vehicles, burnt, sent to hell(yes, tom went there in one episode) they are STILL alive and well.
*shakes head*
Amazing things.
- Mood: amused
Ok. Who in the world was that crazy person who set the A math paper? for some reason or the other, the handiwork of the setter reminds me of my own school teachers. Which by the way, my teachers seem to be trying to outdo themselves everytime they set something.
Currently blogging from my phone. it's a little slow but manageable. But it takes FOREVER to get into blogger, so this might mean i'm really gonna transit to livejournal for good.
Other than that A math paper, the rest were actually quite okay. But if that single paper can cause surround sound screaming loud enough to HURT, I dread the rest of the papers. for my eardrums sake.
Graduation was a blast. I'll post some backdated pictures when i get the chance..
and to us O levelers, keep going. Ends in sight.
Till next time.
Currently blogging from my phone. it's a little slow but manageable. But it takes FOREVER to get into blogger, so this might mean i'm really gonna transit to livejournal for good.
Other than that A math paper, the rest were actually quite okay. But if that single paper can cause surround sound screaming loud enough to HURT, I dread the rest of the papers. for my eardrums sake.
Graduation was a blast. I'll post some backdated pictures when i get the chance..
and to us O levelers, keep going. Ends in sight.
Till next time.
- Mood: shocked
Thanks for this oppurtunity. It helped me alot in a roundabout sort of way.
Now, I finally know to what extent I'm willing to go out and help the people around me, and trust me, I realised that it's inexhaustive.
I feel liberated.
At peace.
This is my commandment that you love one another just as I have loved you
movie heros always puzzle me, So here's a little something I came up with to sort out my thoughts
Heros.
Heros.
There are so many kinds of heros in the movies, so I thought it would be a good idea for me to do a public service and classify them into different kinds of heros, so here goes.
Western hero:
Possesses smouldering good looks, and a typical slang. This unique character has a sense of humour which comes out at in all the unlikely places (etc, hanging off the ledge of the 78th story of a skyscraper). He also seems to be carrying a futuristic electromagnetic pulse field; bullets and knives seem to curve away from him (or maybe he picked the right blind, whoops, sorry, KIND of people to be his enemies). This fella in extreme cases has superhuman regenerative capabilities, he can even pull arrows out of his body with no blood loss (scorpion king).
In a fight, he is either a bumbling fool, or a killer assassin. Strangely, the outcome is always the same; he knocks the entire roomful of baddies out cold. Alone.
The typical hero also has a bizarre muscular and nervous system. When he hears diabolical laughter or a evil plot, he gets a power boost. He suddenly gains the ability to bulldoze through anything and everything. One man against the darn country, and the hero licks their collective asses with his two fists.
Eastern hero:
A slightly darker character than the Western hero. He doesn’t need to joke very often, unless he’s Jackie chan. This guy, though, is somehow chained and shackled to a task which is almost always related to one of his relations, like his sister or younger brother.
Usually possesses the most deadly form of martial arts known to man if it is a film in the olden days setting. This fella can KILL with his little freaking toe. I wonder sometimes why the baddies try to stop him. It’s like dynasty warriors, if you see a 2 metres tall Lu Bu(powerful shit) with a 10 feet long halberd charging to you, what do you do? What? Stand and fight? Ok, join the queue to audition for the latest gongfu movie!
But I digress. The modern eastern movie hero also has a peculiar set of characteristics. Unlike the western counterpart, he does not have superb healing speeds. He. Is. Invulnerable. This guy can run through hell with his hairstyle intact. Of course, once the big bad villain is dead, there is a tendency for his wounds to catch up with him. He usually falls to the ground, and, wait for it… starts coughing blood. It always happens. Then he’s suddenly possessed by the spirit of Confucius or some other great Chinese linguist. Really. How do I know? He makes a tear jerking speech with all the touching eloquence of a gifted orator. Not too bad for someone who doesn’t do much than the usual jumping and screaming and breaking of miscellaneous bones.
Bollywood hero:
Now this is THE guy I can never understand. Firstly, no matter where he goes, he takes an ENTIRE DAMN ENTOURAGE with him. Its like, he has dancers stalking him man! Somehow, these dancers also have telepathy and are able to come up with instant uncheorographed moves on the spot. What’s more, he has won the noble prize for inventing the 3 second instant plant-a-tree seed. He throws them across the ground in a pattern before the impromptu musical, and hey presto! You got a forest of greenery for you to dance around with the girl of your dreams!
The hero also is a gifted singer. Where he finds his time to rescue the damsel and go for singing lessons I have no idea. But it works. Oh, and I almost forgot, he dances too! Singing and dancing.. wow, maybe he should be an actor y’know!
Mr hero also gets himself in the most predictable of solutions. This is so obvious that I’m wondering if he ever read those Disney books every good kid should read when he was a child. It’s like,
Hero: Oh my gosh! Princess Aravalititamatyialabivroni is trapped in the castle of the evil king! Vhatever should I do now?
Oh gosh. You SAVE her dumbass, and since ALL heros possess a certain degree of invulnerability and unlimited power, better be careful. You may destroy the castle by accident.
- Mood:
hyper
today was one of the most enjoyable days I had in church this year.
I'll leave it to people like Stacy to blog about the what and where and when for the main worship. Suffice to say that it was awesome. Too bad I won't be bringing my piano wherever I go. It's a little heavy to say the least.
But this post is more of a tribute to my friends. Those who will read my blog, and those who never will (they don't check blogs -.-)
Anyway, here goes.
Thank you. All of you for just being with me, it's the presence and the time which say the most. Not always the smiles and the laughter.
To those who hang around, thanks for brightening up my day over and over again. I'm not a happy person by nature, but somehow, I'm super content with you people around.
To those who I talk to, thanks for the conversations we had. Sometimes, these kinda stuff help SOO much more than what we actually can see y'know.
To those who I work with, thanks. I really really appreciate the never ending stream of advice, help, and encouragement. It keeps me going when I'm tired, and helps me to be what I know I can be.
To those I argue.. well not argue, but share my ideas with, thanks. Every "argument" has shaped me, and made me who I am. Without these talks to challenge me and my stands, I'll be a simple wishy washy person who goes along with every trend (and I would rather eat my own feet that do THAT)
And finally, to those who I trust.
I know there are not many of you, but it's you people who truly make the difference in my life. I'd probably be totally screwed without you people standing by my side. Thanks for all the laughter we had. Thanks for all the painful memories we shared. Thanks for all the advice that came and went both ways. Thanks for the juicy stories^^. Thanks for helping me in my darker moments. Thanks for all the support. Really.
I only hope that I'll be able to pay back for all the times.
you may have notice that I didn't include the names of anyone. Well, this is because I have absolute faith that you WILL know who you are and how much you mean to me.
thank you.
Till next time.
I'll leave it to people like Stacy to blog about the what and where and when for the main worship. Suffice to say that it was awesome. Too bad I won't be bringing my piano wherever I go. It's a little heavy to say the least.
But this post is more of a tribute to my friends. Those who will read my blog, and those who never will (they don't check blogs -.-)
Anyway, here goes.
Thank you. All of you for just being with me, it's the presence and the time which say the most. Not always the smiles and the laughter.
To those who hang around, thanks for brightening up my day over and over again. I'm not a happy person by nature, but somehow, I'm super content with you people around.
To those who I talk to, thanks for the conversations we had. Sometimes, these kinda stuff help SOO much more than what we actually can see y'know.
To those who I work with, thanks. I really really appreciate the never ending stream of advice, help, and encouragement. It keeps me going when I'm tired, and helps me to be what I know I can be.
To those I argue.. well not argue, but share my ideas with, thanks. Every "argument" has shaped me, and made me who I am. Without these talks to challenge me and my stands, I'll be a simple wishy washy person who goes along with every trend (and I would rather eat my own feet that do THAT)
And finally, to those who I trust.
I know there are not many of you, but it's you people who truly make the difference in my life. I'd probably be totally screwed without you people standing by my side. Thanks for all the laughter we had. Thanks for all the painful memories we shared. Thanks for all the advice that came and went both ways. Thanks for the juicy stories^^. Thanks for helping me in my darker moments. Thanks for all the support. Really.
I only hope that I'll be able to pay back for all the times.
you may have notice that I didn't include the names of anyone. Well, this is because I have absolute faith that you WILL know who you are and how much you mean to me.
thank you.
Till next time.
i hate studying social studies with other people.
I really really do.
Now it's no fault of mine and no fault of theirs as well. The main problem is that whenever I work with people for SS, I'm dead accurate in spotting questions.
I mean dead accurate. 4 questions spotted correctly is the average.
But the main problem is that even though I managed to spot correctly, I CANT DO THE QUESTION!!
argh so I rely on my usual crapping techniques, quite sophiscated crap I must add.
Chemistry tomorrow. Wonder what'll happen
I really really do.
Now it's no fault of mine and no fault of theirs as well. The main problem is that whenever I work with people for SS, I'm dead accurate in spotting questions.
I mean dead accurate. 4 questions spotted correctly is the average.
But the main problem is that even though I managed to spot correctly, I CANT DO THE QUESTION!!
argh so I rely on my usual crapping techniques, quite sophiscated crap I must add.
Chemistry tomorrow. Wonder what'll happen
- Mood: tired
Okay, my first attempt to strike a balance between LJ and blogspot. Honestly I'm quite attached to my blogspot skin so I don't really want to move..
Ah heck, double posting here I come.
Anyway, school these days is growing more and more strange.
Really, I mean, this is what I heard from my school friend.
"tomorrow don't come school. Stay home and study"
Thats my class for you. We seem to be more productive without the irritants we call teachers over our ears most of the time.
I mean, isn't a school SUPPOSED to be a place for learning? If we can achieve more at home, there must be something reaally wrong.
Hmmm, I'm starting to ramble here. That's what happens when I post without a specific topic.
Oh ya, I finally figured out why I'm so confused on my personality kinds.
Out of the 4, D(dominant), I(charismatic), S(steady), and C(concientious), my I S and C are very well balanced, almost to the point of tying with each other.
But I'm hell not D. That's one thing I'm not, not now, not ever.
"I" because i CAN take on leadership if absolutely necessary, if i see nobody willing, I'll do it.
"S" because i'm quite the anchor when it come to group projects and teamwork kinda stuff.
"C" because... well, you people know me. It's darn obvious right?
gotta run! have to study social studies.. it'spropaganda really enlightening!
till next time
Ah heck, double posting here I come.
Anyway, school these days is growing more and more strange.
Really, I mean, this is what I heard from my school friend.
"tomorrow don't come school. Stay home and study"
Thats my class for you. We seem to be more productive without the irritants we call teachers over our ears most of the time.
I mean, isn't a school SUPPOSED to be a place for learning? If we can achieve more at home, there must be something reaally wrong.
Hmmm, I'm starting to ramble here. That's what happens when I post without a specific topic.
Oh ya, I finally figured out why I'm so confused on my personality kinds.
Out of the 4, D(dominant), I(charismatic), S(steady), and C(concientious), my I S and C are very well balanced, almost to the point of tying with each other.
But I'm hell not D. That's one thing I'm not, not now, not ever.
"I" because i CAN take on leadership if absolutely necessary, if i see nobody willing, I'll do it.
"S" because i'm quite the anchor when it come to group projects and teamwork kinda stuff.
"C" because... well, you people know me. It's darn obvious right?
gotta run! have to study social studies.. it's
till next time
- Mood: relaxed
okay, an insight post.
Heart to Heart
no this is not actually about crushes or relationships, but more of what communication can truly be, in an idealistic sense.
Many a time, people talk, but do not actually communicate. Don't understand? This song lyrics may help to paint a clearer picture.
And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand people maybe more
People talking without speaking
People hearing without listening
People writing songs that voices never shared
No one dared Disturb
the sound of silence
although many speak, no information gets across.
"hi how are you"
"oh I'm fine:)"
Seriously, most of the time, the other person is defintely NOT fine at all. They state they are okay, but in their hearts, they know otherwise.
sad eh? entire parties and events can be based on NOTHING but this kinda conversation. It's very tiring. In places like clubs, you hardly hear anything but the weather, celebs, fashion( even thats quite rare), games, sports, etc.
Nothing interesting, nothing truly worth much.
Below are levels of communication with other people, they range from cold to very intimate. Hope you'll get a good picture of these.
Level 1) Cliche conversations
The example I used earlier was an illustration of this. This is THE weakest possible response to any communication, and is the lowest level of self-communication.
In fact, hardly any communication happens here at all. It's all about the "how's your family?" "where have you been? "your dress is lovely!"
If the other party actually answers the "how are you" question in detail, I guarantee, you'll be astonished.
But this never happens. Thankfully too, because the asker usually doesn't want to know the full answer to his question.
Level 2) Report of facts.
On this level, we do not usually step out of our personal lonliness into the world of real communication. We expose little of ourselves.
In this level, we tell of what others have said and done. There is nothing personal, self-revalatory, or revealing.
Like how people hide in cliche conversations, many shelter in such reports. Gossip items, conversation pieces, and little narrations of others and juicy information reign in this level.
Here, we give nothing of true value, and take nothing of value either.
Level 3) My ideas and judgements
In this level, there is some communication of person to others. In this level, people are willing to step out of our mental confinement.
I take the risk to tell you my ideas and jugdements. However, this communication is still under a strong censorship.
As I speak, I watch for your reaction. I want to test the water before I fully commit. I want to be sure you'll accept my ideas before I reveal my thoughts.=
If you raise your eyebrows or look disapprovingly, I'll retreat and hide behind level 2.
Worse, I'll try to say things that'll please you.
Only if we trust another, then will the progression to the next, and final stage take place.
Level 4) My emotions and feelings
Now, this hardly happens. Even in the relationships between best friends.
But when I decide to tell you who I am, I share what I feel.
A person is not only made up of thoughts, he or she is also made up of feelings and emotions.
For a complete picture, all are needed to be shown.
The beauty of sharing emotions is that it is absolutely unique. If I report facts, there may be identicals around. For example, many may support the PAP, and many may like to shop as a pastime, or play computer games.
But as for FEELINGS. No one experiences the exact same emotions that I experience; my feelings of joy, of fustration, of loyalty, or my passions. These things belong to me and no one else.
These are the feelings that will be shared in this level of conversation. I'll give an example.
I think you are smart (report, level 3)
AND.....
... I admire you
... I am jealous
...I feel that you're better than me
...I am at unease with it
...I'm proud to be your friend
...I desire to humilate you
See? So many different possible reactions.
The main rule is that these emotions have to be shared when they are felt, any delay will neutralise the process.
Most of us feel that others will not tolerate such emotional honesty in communication. I may cover my dishonesty on the grounds that I might hurt others.
This reasoning occurs everwhere. Not only between casual aquaintances, but
also
Within families.
Within friendships
Within marriages
Within cliques *snort*
in our human state, we will never stay at a prolonged stage of Level 4. It's impossible.
But at this point, the 2 people in this level will feel perfect empathy and understanding for each other. They will understand each other as best as they possibly can. It is the peak of people
Of friends.
to reveal myself openly takes the rawest possible form of courage
Till next time.
Heart to Heart
no this is not actually about crushes or relationships, but more of what communication can truly be, in an idealistic sense.
Many a time, people talk, but do not actually communicate. Don't understand? This song lyrics may help to paint a clearer picture.
And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand people maybe more
People talking without speaking
People hearing without listening
People writing songs that voices never shared
No one dared Disturb
the sound of silence
although many speak, no information gets across.
"hi how are you"
"oh I'm fine:)"
Seriously, most of the time, the other person is defintely NOT fine at all. They state they are okay, but in their hearts, they know otherwise.
sad eh? entire parties and events can be based on NOTHING but this kinda conversation. It's very tiring. In places like clubs, you hardly hear anything but the weather, celebs, fashion( even thats quite rare), games, sports, etc.
Nothing interesting, nothing truly worth much.
Below are levels of communication with other people, they range from cold to very intimate. Hope you'll get a good picture of these.
Level 1) Cliche conversations
The example I used earlier was an illustration of this. This is THE weakest possible response to any communication, and is the lowest level of self-communication.
In fact, hardly any communication happens here at all. It's all about the "how's your family?" "where have you been? "your dress is lovely!"
If the other party actually answers the "how are you" question in detail, I guarantee, you'll be astonished.
But this never happens. Thankfully too, because the asker usually doesn't want to know the full answer to his question.
Level 2) Report of facts.
On this level, we do not usually step out of our personal lonliness into the world of real communication. We expose little of ourselves.
In this level, we tell of what others have said and done. There is nothing personal, self-revalatory, or revealing.
Like how people hide in cliche conversations, many shelter in such reports. Gossip items, conversation pieces, and little narrations of others and juicy information reign in this level.
Here, we give nothing of true value, and take nothing of value either.
Level 3) My ideas and judgements
In this level, there is some communication of person to others. In this level, people are willing to step out of our mental confinement.
I take the risk to tell you my ideas and jugdements. However, this communication is still under a strong censorship.
As I speak, I watch for your reaction. I want to test the water before I fully commit. I want to be sure you'll accept my ideas before I reveal my thoughts.=
If you raise your eyebrows or look disapprovingly, I'll retreat and hide behind level 2.
Worse, I'll try to say things that'll please you.
Only if we trust another, then will the progression to the next, and final stage take place.
Level 4) My emotions and feelings
Now, this hardly happens. Even in the relationships between best friends.
But when I decide to tell you who I am, I share what I feel.
A person is not only made up of thoughts, he or she is also made up of feelings and emotions.
For a complete picture, all are needed to be shown.
The beauty of sharing emotions is that it is absolutely unique. If I report facts, there may be identicals around. For example, many may support the PAP, and many may like to shop as a pastime, or play computer games.
But as for FEELINGS. No one experiences the exact same emotions that I experience; my feelings of joy, of fustration, of loyalty, or my passions. These things belong to me and no one else.
These are the feelings that will be shared in this level of conversation. I'll give an example.
I think you are smart (report, level 3)
AND.....
... I admire you
... I am jealous
...I feel that you're better than me
...I am at unease with it
...I'm proud to be your friend
...I desire to humilate you
See? So many different possible reactions.
The main rule is that these emotions have to be shared when they are felt, any delay will neutralise the process.
Most of us feel that others will not tolerate such emotional honesty in communication. I may cover my dishonesty on the grounds that I might hurt others.
This reasoning occurs everwhere. Not only between casual aquaintances, but
also
Within families.
Within friendships
Within marriages
Within cliques *snort*
in our human state, we will never stay at a prolonged stage of Level 4. It's impossible.
But at this point, the 2 people in this level will feel perfect empathy and understanding for each other. They will understand each other as best as they possibly can. It is the peak of people
Of friends.
to reveal myself openly takes the rawest possible form of courage
Till next time.
Oceans apart day after day
And I slowly go insane
I hear your voice on the line
But it doesn't stop the pain
If I see you next to never
How can we say forever
Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you
I took for granted, all the times
That I though would last somehow
I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can't get near you now
Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' CrAzY
Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you
I wonder how we can survive
This romance
But in the end if I'm with you
I'll take the chance
Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' cRaZy
Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you
Holy shit. I'm SO learning to play this song
.
.
.
.
.
Ok, bout 20 min, and done (cackle insanely).
Simple song it is..
- Mood: drained
Okay, first post on this place, and also encountering some teething problems with livejournal.
I'm not sure if I should stay in here.. Blogger still looks simpler
OOO they got something called poetsociety:)
that may change things.
Time to unload
I'm not sure if I should stay in here.. Blogger still looks simpler
OOO they got something called poetsociety:)
that may change things.
Time to unload
- Mood:
contemplative
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